You'll be able to sleep easy at 1617 East 9th Street; the building and 'hood have an impeccable safety record
Hope you like squalor. On the bright side, the roaches at 1617 East 9th Street are fairly courteous.
The only way to make life better at 1617 East 9th Street might be hiring a butler (or two).
Living at 1617 East 9th Street will literally make you feel like you've won the grand prize - every day